I’m not perfect, just completely flawed. What makes me think I am good enough for someone? I want this, I want that. But do I really deserve this and that? Before judging a person, I’ve to judge myself. I have baggage that others won’t be able to carry along with them.
Truth be told, I am scared. I am not like any other girls, who are prettier, more eloquent than I can ever be. I have my own set of insecurities. I never had to feel this way when I am alone. But having to get to know someone, I am afraid I’ll chicken out.
People around me have been asking what am I afraid of when getting to know someone. I get taken aback. How can you not get scared? Where do you get the confidence? Part of me feels a little be guilty even! Like should I even go for it or should I just wait?
I’ve plucked up the courage to go for it but, urgh, I get nervous thinking about it. And somehow I feel like some pathetic loser.
Seriously, being single is the best. No obligations, no effort trying to make someone understand you. I am not an easy person to understand, because I do not let my feelings out freely. I will be a burden to get to know.
I just wonder who will be able to appreciate me and understand me wholeheartedly.
Let’s just wait and see.
May Allah bless you, whoever you may be (: