Sometimes even I don’t understand why I’ll just take in what other people say even when it’s not true. I know that I am timid to stand up for myself. That has been my weakness ever since poly started. But I know I have to do something about it, especially when people disgrace my religion.
Actually, I’m afraid of the consequences of standing up for myself. Because, it’ll just lead to a fight. When a fight happen, matters are left hanging without a solution. Sooner of later, negative feelings will form and pile up. In the end either party would have reached their patience limit and would blow up. Thus, a friendship would be gone just like that.
Yes, I am talking about a specific person. The more I get to know her the more I feel like she’s exactly like what she’s proclaiming she isn’t. It’s not that I don’t like her, I just don’t like how she’s putting all the negative vibe on me and pulling me down along with her. I’d a million times rather be alone. So I’ve been silencing myself in her presence, hoping that I get to get away or escape to other realms.
I have enough of gossiping and bitching. I don’t need anymore drama in my life, considering the past events that had happen in the past years. When I have finally found peace in my mind and heart, she just had to come along.
Things were much easier when we’re hi bye friends. I am just praying that I can get away from her in the future. Once again, I don’t despise her or anything. I just feel like it’s better when we weren’t hanging out.